The Challenge of Being a Father
My son recently celebrated his fourth birthday. My daughter and I went to our first father-daughter dance. This weekend my wife and I attended our daughter’s school’s fundraising auction. It’s all so strange. My parents go to school auctions… not me. I felt like I was in high school sneaking in the back door at the party. At any minute, someone was going to realize that I didn’t belong. Hell, my kids can’t really be old enough for all this. Can they?
At the same time I feel like I’m missing out on their lives. I spend too much time at work – even though I work from home. And when I’m not working I have other responsibilities – there is always something that needs to be fixed around here. In the odd spaces in between, I may actually have something I want to do for myself. And all the time I feel guilty because they are growing up and I’m not spending enough time with them. One day soon they aren’t going to want to play tag or My Little Ponies or let me push them on the swing – and it will be too late.
I know there’s no good answer. There simply aren’t enough hours in the day and I have to make the decisions that are in the best interest of my family. But that doesn’t mean I don’t wish I had more time.